We've made it another year!
But to be honest, I am already nervous... 3 days in and I'm griped by fear. That has got to be a record!
Where's my prize???
This May, I graduate from my Master program. I'm crossing the stage to receive my degree in Creative Writing and...
Well, that's just it. I don't know what's next. And I'm scared.
I've been here 3 years ago (where does the time go?), staring at the unknown, not sure of which way to go.
All I do know, this time around, is that I'm seeking God's face about this issue. I'm not moving to the left or right until He tells me where to go.
But in the meantime, in perfect Regine style, I'm complaining to my friend on the phone.
And in her fashion, she interrupts me and says, "While you wait, don't just sit on your ass and twiddle your thumbs. Find out what your options are so that He can actually lead you somewhere."
Then in His merciful way, God puts a spotlight on Numbers 13 in my head.
In this chapter, the Israelites are approaching the promise land, so God said, "Send men to scout the country of Canaan that I am giving to the People of Israel."
"Go and see what I am going to give you."
God can tell you all about what He wants to do through you but if you don't step out in faith, if you don't walk out in faith, nothing is going to happen.
The Israelites had to go out into the unknown and get a vision of the promise that God gave Abraham many moons ago, who left everything that was familiar and comfortable because God told him to. Abraham didn't know where he was going but he knew that the One who called him was faithful to do it.
Now, centuries later they stood at the peripheral of the unknown that held their promise land.
40 days later, the scouts came back with good news: the land was exactly the way that God described it all along. A land overflowing with milk and honey, with massive grapes and pomegranates and figs...
But... there's always a but conveniently found when God tells you to do something (or is that just me?)
There were giants and lions and bears oh my!!!
Unfortunately, ten of the twelve men who were sent into the land, focused on the obstacles that the unknown held.
But... I'm grateful that God rebuffs our rebuttals; He isn't going to let go of you that easily.
Caleb butts in and said, "We should go up and take possession of the land for we can certainly do it."
Which is kind weird. I'm sure Caleb saw the same things that the other ten saw:
1) powerful, fierce people
2) large, fortified cities
3) and let's not forget about the giants
I'm sure they saw the same things, however, Caleb didn't allow what he saw eclipse God or drown out His promises.
He remembered what God said, "I will give you this land." Caleb was going to trust in God and go get that land.
Regardless of what they found, God said that it was theirs. It didn't matter what it looked like, it was theirs to take.
It doesn't matter how it looks like or how it makes you feel, if God said it, it's already done. Now walk in it.
Like the Israelites, we have a choice to make: will you listen to God's word or the circumstances' report? Whose voice will we listen to?
And I get it, the circumstances are terrifying but God's word reigns, His promises reign! His truth doesn't stop being the truth because it gets hard.
When you feel like you can't do it, then you need to remember that through Christ, you can do anything.
When you feel ugly, then you need to remember that God calls you beautifully and wonderfully made.
When you feel scared, then you need to remember that God said to not be afraid for He is with you and will never leave you nor forsake you.
When you feel weak, then you need to remember that God's grace is sufficient for you because His strength is made perfect in your weakness.Stop listening to the lies, stop looking at the walls, the giants, the circumstances and remember His truth!
I think God allowed them a sneak peek, so that when the hard times came, they could remember what they were fighting for in order to keep on fighting.
But most importantly, He wanted them to know that they weren't fighting for victory. They were fighting from victory. It was already theirs. Their situation just needed to catch up to God's reality.
I love God. This chapter was what I needed: a reminder that, although it's horribly dark and frightening, the unknown holds the fulfillment of His promises to me and that I need to stop skirting around it and go get it. Otherwise, I will never see it.
And yea, I don't know what the promise looks like just yet but if I start looking, I know God is going to reveal it to me.
So, I need to start walking.
What about you? What do you need to start walking towards?
